Ever since I subscribed, I have read almost all of your posts. Every word. One is more interesting and useful than the other and they have helped me a lot at times.
I began writing when I was 25 (now I am 33). Back then I wrote dozens of stories and I was excited about it. They were solid, in a way, but my amateur eyes couldn't spot the small details that make good storytelling. As the years passed, I started to truly observe my writing style and hated it actually. At that time I was reading the Cemetery Of Forgotten Books by Carlos Ruiz Zafon. His writing style poisoned my with fascination and jealousy. I wanted to write my stories the way he did. He seemed, like so many other writers, to choose the perfect word for each instance, a skill I didn't have. Question popped into my head. "How am I going to learn to write like this?", "How can a mess such as my first draft be transformed into something beautiful?", "How did those writers learn how to do it?" And these questions started affecting me. They gradually slowed me down until my engines were dead.
I have more than 10 stories in my head ready, quite fully formed. I can narrate them from beginning to end. But... I can't write them. I know beforehand that they are not going to be as I want them to be. I tried writing without caring about the results. (Your posts about Zero Draft and The Lump of Clay helped me a lot). So, full speed ahead, I told myself and began writing, until... I stopped and looked at some of the sentences I had written and thought that a monkey with a stick could have done it better. Then I froze and stepped away from it for a couple of days. After convincing myself again that it's only the first draft, the skeleton, the foundations, that it doesn't have to be perfect, that I can edit later, I went back and wrote a few more paragraphs before I came to a full stop. That was three weeks ago. I don't dare write anything now.
Although I know that practice is the only way to get better, it seems like a seed that can't find proper soil in my brain and gets discarded every time. So, yes, Despair has a good hold on me and doesn't show any intentions to let go soon.
I'm sorry to hear that, Andreas. You're not alone. For one thing, I don't know any writer who gets it down perfectly from the image in their mind.
I don't think it's possible, actually. I compare it to a dream. You know how some dreams make perfect sense when you're dreaming them, but then you wake up and you think, well, what the hell was that all about?
Stories in your head can be the same way. They live perfectly in there because they don't need things like story development and good description and sometimes character names, etc. Once you start trying to explain the story to someone else -- which is what you're doing when you write it -- everything starts to fall apart.
But that's okay. Often, I find the thing that I *do* get down onto the paper is better than what it was in my head. At least, it could be. To get there though, I needed to let go of what I thought it was at first.
The good news is, it got much easier for me. Now, I don't even thing about it. A story in my head is just the starting point. It's where I step off and explore, teasing out the details that make it what it needs to be. Honestly, I don't even try to get it "perfect". It's like creating a painting of that piece of pottery. You can make it 100% lifelifke, but it will never hold coffee...
That's okay too, because it's not supposed to.
My advice, if you're open to some, is to try to not compare what you're putting down on paper to that thing you have in your head. It will never hold coffee. But you might be able to turn it into something else you like just as much, and maybe better. Easier said than done, I know! But I'm not as worried about that stuff today because I've written and written and written. I'm certainly not perfect, and I still have days where I love what I wrote in the evening and wake up and hate it in the morning. But that gets less and less as well.
The other thing I might suggest is that if you can recite it, then recite it! Get a recording app for your phone (if it doesn't have one) and just dictate the whole thing. Then, type it out from there. It might be a way to get it down more the way you want it.
Just some ideas -- I hope they help!
Thanks for your kind words. I was just saying to someone the other day that sometimes you don't know if people are reading this or what. It's good to hear that people are, and that the newsletter is helping!
Thank you very much, Graham and I am sorry for the late reply.
You have precisely described my thoughts. There have been many times, when I had a marvelous idea for a story and when I narrated it to myself, it didn't only fall apart, it turned to dust. Still happens sometimes.
That is my main problem. As you said, most of the times I compare what I write to the vision I have in my head. And sometimes, to make things worse, I compare what I write to a finished novel of an author I admire, only to discover that on one hand we have a beautifully written story and on the other some childish scribblings.
When I read The Lump of Clay, I felt excited. There, I said to myself. You don't have to worry about it. You can reshape it later and give it whatever form you want. And then, as I start to right, that voice of resistance in me says "You think you can reshape that mess later? I would like to see you try." At that point I acknowledge that it may be messy beyond repair and I end up leaving it alone. The saddest part is that the story continues to exist in my head and not on paper.
One other problem I have is that I have always been a good student. What I mean is I was good at learning things and getting better at them, because I have always had some sort of compass. I knew I was on the right path, so I kept going. When it comes to writing, there is no compass, there is no path(at least I don't see a clear one), and I don't know if what I do is the right thing. I suppose my own head is worse than a lump of clay.
Personally, I believe when it comes to writing and being creative, everything you do is the "right way". Art including writing is creative. I've found that the times I try to reach for other people's ideas of "right", I come up short. Not only that, I lose motivation and creativity. I need to do it my way!
That being said, there is the art and there is the craft of writing. The writer needs to learn how to connect with the reader to get those ideas across effectively and trigger the right emotions. So there is room to learn craft.
I have several possible suggestions, and you can try some or all:
- Write anyway. I've said this one before. There have been many times when I've felt dejected and that writing just isn't worth it -- particularly in my fiction writing. But, to quote a famous song, I haven't got time for the pain. I write anyway. I write because I want to write. And, the more I write, the better I get.
- Read books on craft. I and a couple of other writers recently launched a book club for writers focusing on books about the craft of writing. These types of books have given me actionable tools to help me improve my writing.
- Read books in your genre. And lots of them. You can't help but start seeing patterns and mimicking them. And if you consciously watch what the author is doing, you'll pick it up faster.
- Keep your goals simple and within your control. For example, don't make publishing this year a goal. You don't have control over that. But you do have control over writing a short story a month and submitting them. Goal accomplished! If it gets rejected, send it somewhere else. But these are straightforward goals you have the power to reach successfully.
We've all been there. I say that because I know learning famous writers struggle too has helped me. When Margaret Atwood talks about imposter syndrome, you know that nobody's safe!
Ultimately, just have fun with writing, if you want to write. Submit if you want to publish, but don't hang everything on that. The best writers in the world are rejected all the time. Don't make rejection "failure". Make it part of the process. Have fun, submit your work (if you choose too), and let the rest take care of itself.
Thank you again, Graham. All your advice are very interesting and useful and that is the main reason why I read your posts as soon as you publish them.
When I read "Write anyway and you can go back and fix it later", I say to myself yes, that is the way it has to be done. No shortcuts. But sometimes I find it is easier said than done. I find it very hard not looking at what I have already written and resenting it.
I think I just have to try harder to tame that voice of resistance in my head. If I could totally banish it would be perfect.
One of my more obscure fears is "Am I sure that if I keep practicing I will improve?" I mean, is there a possibility that the way I practice writing may be so wrong that I take step backwards instead of forward? But then I think you never do it, you will never know the results and whether you are truly capable of doing it.
As you said, if Margaret Atwood has imposter syndrome, it appears we are all doomed.
One thing that helps me not resent my writing is to let it sit longer. Stuff I go back to weeks, months after grow apart from me, so I'm not as close to it emotionally. Plus, it's easier to see where to make the changes.
Margaret Atwood's imposter syndrome is clearly misplaced. There is a bigger thing at work. We all feel like imposters. We all keep writing though. Personally, I just write for fun. If something good comes of it, great. If not, well, I still had fun!
This sounds like me before I took my summer hiatus. But I didn't post the despair part ... just ate it. Everything about Substack feels different now, and I find that very frustrating. I lose about 8-10 subscribers EVERY TIME I POST now and I keep thinking ... this is my best stuff and it's exactly what I tell new subscribers to expect from me ... so who are these idiots who keep subscribing and bailing when they don't like what I'm doing?? I've been reverse growing since my "return" in August after years of relying on slow but steady subscriber growth. I can't remember the last time a publication "recommended" me. I had to dig around to find the "cross-post" function the other day because that's apparently not something anyone wants to do anymore. Speaking of digging around - there is a button somewhere on your HOME feed (couldn't tell you where because I swear they move it around so people can't find it) where you can switch from EXPLORE (the twitter feed Substack wants you to see) and FOLLOWING (where you'll find all the writers you subscribe to and/or follow on Notes. Hope that helps!!!
Yeah, I didn't touch on unsubscribes. Don't get me started on that! It's definitely a gut punch. Every. Single. Time. Often, I'll get an unsubscribe or two before I even get a like or a comment. It feels like, "Hey! Here's my heart on a platter!" and they're like, "Meh. Pass."
When I stop to think though, I'm fairly pragmatic about it. People sign up for one reason and unsubscribe for another. I do the same thing. I'll bet even Margaret Atwood gets unsubscribes. People get overwhelmed with emails from time to time, and the "Unsubscribe" button is an easy way to solve part of the problem.
As a good friend told me once, if they unsubscribe, they're not your target audience anyway, so best to be just done with them and move on.
Personally, I try to ignore the whole subscriber thing as best I can. I thought I would have been further ahead by now. But, whatever. I find I feel happier if I focus on the people who do want to read my stuff and engage than the people who don't.
Thanks for the tips on Substack's Explore vs. Following! I half-suspect that Substack likes to confuse. Keeps you going in the direction they want -- an old (yet still current...) Google trick!
Lastly, about that "reverse growth" -- I was part of a conversation recently that pointed out people are more likely to "follow" you now than to "subscribe" like before. So, whereas before you'd replace subscribers lost through natural attrition with other subscribers, now you might be replacing them with followers instead.
This helps Substack, but hurts the writers, I think -- and not just for the messed-up metrics thing.
You always seem to have a window into my writing life. Not sure I should be thankful or concerned! LOL Nevertheless I do appreciate your raw, unfiltered assessment of the writer's dilemma. I compensate by baking and walking! Cookies anyone??
I've heard from others that I'm "inside their head" -- I can assure you, the only head I'm inside is mine! Seems like this is the time of year that everyone starts to founder.
Baking is another creative thing to do instead for sure. Plus, you get to eat the results!
Thank you! Your raw emotions touched a nerve and I appreciate your willingness to share. Right now I am on a see-saw desperately looking for balance. I have no secret solutions.
That's the thing, I think: no secret solutions. I've done things that help, like working on something else creative to kickstart the writing again. But it isn't a sure-fire formula; there aren't any guarantees.
Sometimes just putting your head down and writing *anything* is helpful as well. That's my plan for November: do Zero Draft writing for a month, and worrying about what it all looks like later... lol
This year for me has been a mix-up of emotions complicated by grief, anger and thoughts of if only. I hope for more in 2026, but maybe my November goals will help turn the dial on my feelings. Like you, I also find that changing light levels make things more challenging and difficult. Thanks, Graham, for the honesty of your post.
Yes, 2025 was not my favourite year either. I'm hoping November will make a strong segue into 2026! I've decided that the best I can do is just write and let everything else take care of itself.
Just one little problem with the beachfront cabin idea … $$$. BUT, the sun came out yesterday and I gobbled it up by going out on a 10-mile walk. I seize the light whenever I can get it.
Yeah, maybe beachfront is too ambitious. How about condo facing away from the sea?
A 10-mile walk -- now that's a commitment! I maxed out at just over 10 km, so, what, less than 7 miles? It wasn't the distance that gets me so much as the time. And these days, 3+ hours is almost half the daylight! lol
That’s the worst part about having a full-time job isn’t it: you’re basically trapped inside during the only available daylight. And when you’re as far north as we are—checking Google Maps, yup, pretty close—there’s not much of it, is there? I used a high-intensity light box for years, but haven’t felt the need as much now that I’m retired and really can get out in the light more.
Been there, avoided the work, done the work for x minutes or 100 words, despaired of the work, quit the work, started new work, hated that work, read the previous work, restarted previous work, abandoned work, went out and coiled up hoses and put the chairs into the woodshed for the season, reread previous work—“hey not bad”—repeat ad infinitum, with flourishes and embellishments and occasional moments of “FFS just send out something” and publications.
Ha - yes. Sometimes just sending something out FFS (the new COD) is a big part of the treatment. #GraNoWriMo was certainly born of that. It was... not a fast win. But a relatively easy and definitely one where I could take back some control!
I like to remind myself that there is a seasonal perspective to everything in life. A spring of rapid and intense germination, a summer of long ripening, the harvest and dying off in fall, and winter of rest, hibernation, dormancy. So being stuck is just part of the seasonal aspect, and perhaps a necessary part of preparing for the next season. Let me know how that lands!
Totally relate, just went through it recently. I don't know the full answer to curing it, but I had a serious rut after a happy burst of productivity and some moderate success, but a couple of wins after a long string of losses sparked a rebirth inside of me. Now I've exploded with productivity and getting a lot of networking going. Even my wife reminded me it's often a 3-5 year upward climb when we're in this game starving for a bone. I had 16 years as an A-list music and film journalist and lost it all with the mags folding from the internet. It's been a slow rebuild trying to gain traction, but it's slowly coming. Find new things to work on when you finish a project and let that be your norm. That way you've built a long string of submissions you're not obsessing to hear back from and you're staying in fluid motion. Stay strong, Graham.
Thanks Ray. I didn't know that was your past writing life! What an interesting career that must have been. I mean, I know rock and movie stars are "just people like everyone else", but the stories they would have!
Yeah, the "finding new projects" resonates. That's often how I dig out of any creative funk. Thankfully, it worked this time, too!
Ever since I subscribed, I have read almost all of your posts. Every word. One is more interesting and useful than the other and they have helped me a lot at times.
I began writing when I was 25 (now I am 33). Back then I wrote dozens of stories and I was excited about it. They were solid, in a way, but my amateur eyes couldn't spot the small details that make good storytelling. As the years passed, I started to truly observe my writing style and hated it actually. At that time I was reading the Cemetery Of Forgotten Books by Carlos Ruiz Zafon. His writing style poisoned my with fascination and jealousy. I wanted to write my stories the way he did. He seemed, like so many other writers, to choose the perfect word for each instance, a skill I didn't have. Question popped into my head. "How am I going to learn to write like this?", "How can a mess such as my first draft be transformed into something beautiful?", "How did those writers learn how to do it?" And these questions started affecting me. They gradually slowed me down until my engines were dead.
I have more than 10 stories in my head ready, quite fully formed. I can narrate them from beginning to end. But... I can't write them. I know beforehand that they are not going to be as I want them to be. I tried writing without caring about the results. (Your posts about Zero Draft and The Lump of Clay helped me a lot). So, full speed ahead, I told myself and began writing, until... I stopped and looked at some of the sentences I had written and thought that a monkey with a stick could have done it better. Then I froze and stepped away from it for a couple of days. After convincing myself again that it's only the first draft, the skeleton, the foundations, that it doesn't have to be perfect, that I can edit later, I went back and wrote a few more paragraphs before I came to a full stop. That was three weeks ago. I don't dare write anything now.
Although I know that practice is the only way to get better, it seems like a seed that can't find proper soil in my brain and gets discarded every time. So, yes, Despair has a good hold on me and doesn't show any intentions to let go soon.
I'm sorry to hear that, Andreas. You're not alone. For one thing, I don't know any writer who gets it down perfectly from the image in their mind.
I don't think it's possible, actually. I compare it to a dream. You know how some dreams make perfect sense when you're dreaming them, but then you wake up and you think, well, what the hell was that all about?
Stories in your head can be the same way. They live perfectly in there because they don't need things like story development and good description and sometimes character names, etc. Once you start trying to explain the story to someone else -- which is what you're doing when you write it -- everything starts to fall apart.
But that's okay. Often, I find the thing that I *do* get down onto the paper is better than what it was in my head. At least, it could be. To get there though, I needed to let go of what I thought it was at first.
The good news is, it got much easier for me. Now, I don't even thing about it. A story in my head is just the starting point. It's where I step off and explore, teasing out the details that make it what it needs to be. Honestly, I don't even try to get it "perfect". It's like creating a painting of that piece of pottery. You can make it 100% lifelifke, but it will never hold coffee...
That's okay too, because it's not supposed to.
My advice, if you're open to some, is to try to not compare what you're putting down on paper to that thing you have in your head. It will never hold coffee. But you might be able to turn it into something else you like just as much, and maybe better. Easier said than done, I know! But I'm not as worried about that stuff today because I've written and written and written. I'm certainly not perfect, and I still have days where I love what I wrote in the evening and wake up and hate it in the morning. But that gets less and less as well.
The other thing I might suggest is that if you can recite it, then recite it! Get a recording app for your phone (if it doesn't have one) and just dictate the whole thing. Then, type it out from there. It might be a way to get it down more the way you want it.
Just some ideas -- I hope they help!
Thanks for your kind words. I was just saying to someone the other day that sometimes you don't know if people are reading this or what. It's good to hear that people are, and that the newsletter is helping!
Thank you very much, Graham and I am sorry for the late reply.
You have precisely described my thoughts. There have been many times, when I had a marvelous idea for a story and when I narrated it to myself, it didn't only fall apart, it turned to dust. Still happens sometimes.
That is my main problem. As you said, most of the times I compare what I write to the vision I have in my head. And sometimes, to make things worse, I compare what I write to a finished novel of an author I admire, only to discover that on one hand we have a beautifully written story and on the other some childish scribblings.
When I read The Lump of Clay, I felt excited. There, I said to myself. You don't have to worry about it. You can reshape it later and give it whatever form you want. And then, as I start to right, that voice of resistance in me says "You think you can reshape that mess later? I would like to see you try." At that point I acknowledge that it may be messy beyond repair and I end up leaving it alone. The saddest part is that the story continues to exist in my head and not on paper.
One other problem I have is that I have always been a good student. What I mean is I was good at learning things and getting better at them, because I have always had some sort of compass. I knew I was on the right path, so I kept going. When it comes to writing, there is no compass, there is no path(at least I don't see a clear one), and I don't know if what I do is the right thing. I suppose my own head is worse than a lump of clay.
Personally, I believe when it comes to writing and being creative, everything you do is the "right way". Art including writing is creative. I've found that the times I try to reach for other people's ideas of "right", I come up short. Not only that, I lose motivation and creativity. I need to do it my way!
That being said, there is the art and there is the craft of writing. The writer needs to learn how to connect with the reader to get those ideas across effectively and trigger the right emotions. So there is room to learn craft.
I have several possible suggestions, and you can try some or all:
- Write anyway. I've said this one before. There have been many times when I've felt dejected and that writing just isn't worth it -- particularly in my fiction writing. But, to quote a famous song, I haven't got time for the pain. I write anyway. I write because I want to write. And, the more I write, the better I get.
- Read books on craft. I and a couple of other writers recently launched a book club for writers focusing on books about the craft of writing. These types of books have given me actionable tools to help me improve my writing.
- Read books in your genre. And lots of them. You can't help but start seeing patterns and mimicking them. And if you consciously watch what the author is doing, you'll pick it up faster.
- Join a writers group for support.
- Join a critique group for feedback.
- Take a writing class. There are a million online courses like this one: https://www.athabascau.ca/syllabi/engl/engl381.html
- Keep your goals simple and within your control. For example, don't make publishing this year a goal. You don't have control over that. But you do have control over writing a short story a month and submitting them. Goal accomplished! If it gets rejected, send it somewhere else. But these are straightforward goals you have the power to reach successfully.
We've all been there. I say that because I know learning famous writers struggle too has helped me. When Margaret Atwood talks about imposter syndrome, you know that nobody's safe!
Ultimately, just have fun with writing, if you want to write. Submit if you want to publish, but don't hang everything on that. The best writers in the world are rejected all the time. Don't make rejection "failure". Make it part of the process. Have fun, submit your work (if you choose too), and let the rest take care of itself.
Hope that's helpful! Break a pen!
Thank you again, Graham. All your advice are very interesting and useful and that is the main reason why I read your posts as soon as you publish them.
When I read "Write anyway and you can go back and fix it later", I say to myself yes, that is the way it has to be done. No shortcuts. But sometimes I find it is easier said than done. I find it very hard not looking at what I have already written and resenting it.
I think I just have to try harder to tame that voice of resistance in my head. If I could totally banish it would be perfect.
One of my more obscure fears is "Am I sure that if I keep practicing I will improve?" I mean, is there a possibility that the way I practice writing may be so wrong that I take step backwards instead of forward? But then I think you never do it, you will never know the results and whether you are truly capable of doing it.
As you said, if Margaret Atwood has imposter syndrome, it appears we are all doomed.
One thing that helps me not resent my writing is to let it sit longer. Stuff I go back to weeks, months after grow apart from me, so I'm not as close to it emotionally. Plus, it's easier to see where to make the changes.
Margaret Atwood's imposter syndrome is clearly misplaced. There is a bigger thing at work. We all feel like imposters. We all keep writing though. Personally, I just write for fun. If something good comes of it, great. If not, well, I still had fun!
And that is the most important, I believe. To have fun. And then, whatever may come.
This sounds like me before I took my summer hiatus. But I didn't post the despair part ... just ate it. Everything about Substack feels different now, and I find that very frustrating. I lose about 8-10 subscribers EVERY TIME I POST now and I keep thinking ... this is my best stuff and it's exactly what I tell new subscribers to expect from me ... so who are these idiots who keep subscribing and bailing when they don't like what I'm doing?? I've been reverse growing since my "return" in August after years of relying on slow but steady subscriber growth. I can't remember the last time a publication "recommended" me. I had to dig around to find the "cross-post" function the other day because that's apparently not something anyone wants to do anymore. Speaking of digging around - there is a button somewhere on your HOME feed (couldn't tell you where because I swear they move it around so people can't find it) where you can switch from EXPLORE (the twitter feed Substack wants you to see) and FOLLOWING (where you'll find all the writers you subscribe to and/or follow on Notes. Hope that helps!!!
Yeah, I didn't touch on unsubscribes. Don't get me started on that! It's definitely a gut punch. Every. Single. Time. Often, I'll get an unsubscribe or two before I even get a like or a comment. It feels like, "Hey! Here's my heart on a platter!" and they're like, "Meh. Pass."
When I stop to think though, I'm fairly pragmatic about it. People sign up for one reason and unsubscribe for another. I do the same thing. I'll bet even Margaret Atwood gets unsubscribes. People get overwhelmed with emails from time to time, and the "Unsubscribe" button is an easy way to solve part of the problem.
As a good friend told me once, if they unsubscribe, they're not your target audience anyway, so best to be just done with them and move on.
Personally, I try to ignore the whole subscriber thing as best I can. I thought I would have been further ahead by now. But, whatever. I find I feel happier if I focus on the people who do want to read my stuff and engage than the people who don't.
Thanks for the tips on Substack's Explore vs. Following! I half-suspect that Substack likes to confuse. Keeps you going in the direction they want -- an old (yet still current...) Google trick!
Lastly, about that "reverse growth" -- I was part of a conversation recently that pointed out people are more likely to "follow" you now than to "subscribe" like before. So, whereas before you'd replace subscribers lost through natural attrition with other subscribers, now you might be replacing them with followers instead.
This helps Substack, but hurts the writers, I think -- and not just for the messed-up metrics thing.
But don't get me started on that...
Oh, I have like 6,000 "followers." Maybe 1 to 3 of them see my Notes so I'm not really sure what that 6,000 is worth. 🙄
I don't even know how many followers I have!
You always seem to have a window into my writing life. Not sure I should be thankful or concerned! LOL Nevertheless I do appreciate your raw, unfiltered assessment of the writer's dilemma. I compensate by baking and walking! Cookies anyone??
Cookies? Yes please!
I've heard from others that I'm "inside their head" -- I can assure you, the only head I'm inside is mine! Seems like this is the time of year that everyone starts to founder.
Baking is another creative thing to do instead for sure. Plus, you get to eat the results!
Thank you! Your raw emotions touched a nerve and I appreciate your willingness to share. Right now I am on a see-saw desperately looking for balance. I have no secret solutions.
That's the thing, I think: no secret solutions. I've done things that help, like working on something else creative to kickstart the writing again. But it isn't a sure-fire formula; there aren't any guarantees.
Sometimes just putting your head down and writing *anything* is helpful as well. That's my plan for November: do Zero Draft writing for a month, and worrying about what it all looks like later... lol
I'm actually getting a little excited about it!
This year for me has been a mix-up of emotions complicated by grief, anger and thoughts of if only. I hope for more in 2026, but maybe my November goals will help turn the dial on my feelings. Like you, I also find that changing light levels make things more challenging and difficult. Thanks, Graham, for the honesty of your post.
Yes, 2025 was not my favourite year either. I'm hoping November will make a strong segue into 2026! I've decided that the best I can do is just write and let everything else take care of itself.
Good seeing you last night!
It’s the diminishing light that sets me off Graham, and I’m totally with you on these feelings.
Time to find a little beachfront cabin in southern climes, methinks! (I heard a rumour it's spring in the southern hemisphere...? lol)
Just one little problem with the beachfront cabin idea … $$$. BUT, the sun came out yesterday and I gobbled it up by going out on a 10-mile walk. I seize the light whenever I can get it.
Yeah, maybe beachfront is too ambitious. How about condo facing away from the sea?
A 10-mile walk -- now that's a commitment! I maxed out at just over 10 km, so, what, less than 7 miles? It wasn't the distance that gets me so much as the time. And these days, 3+ hours is almost half the daylight! lol
That’s the worst part about having a full-time job isn’t it: you’re basically trapped inside during the only available daylight. And when you’re as far north as we are—checking Google Maps, yup, pretty close—there’s not much of it, is there? I used a high-intensity light box for years, but haven’t felt the need as much now that I’m retired and really can get out in the light more.
Yes, we're near the same latitude. In Thunder Bay though, we are so far west in the timezone that it get light a lot later in the morning.
The bright side (literally) is that we don't get dark at 4pm like Toronto does...
Been there, avoided the work, done the work for x minutes or 100 words, despaired of the work, quit the work, started new work, hated that work, read the previous work, restarted previous work, abandoned work, went out and coiled up hoses and put the chairs into the woodshed for the season, reread previous work—“hey not bad”—repeat ad infinitum, with flourishes and embellishments and occasional moments of “FFS just send out something” and publications.
Ha - yes. Sometimes just sending something out FFS (the new COD) is a big part of the treatment. #GraNoWriMo was certainly born of that. It was... not a fast win. But a relatively easy and definitely one where I could take back some control!
This post was an FFS one-off, too.
PS thanks for sharing, keep drinking water and walking.
Thanks for keeping it real, Graham!!
I like to remind myself that there is a seasonal perspective to everything in life. A spring of rapid and intense germination, a summer of long ripening, the harvest and dying off in fall, and winter of rest, hibernation, dormancy. So being stuck is just part of the seasonal aspect, and perhaps a necessary part of preparing for the next season. Let me know how that lands!
It's landing well at the moment, thanks! Yeah, seasonality affects me more and more, I think. What's the "drink more water" answer to seasons?
Barbados, maybe.
Totally relate, just went through it recently. I don't know the full answer to curing it, but I had a serious rut after a happy burst of productivity and some moderate success, but a couple of wins after a long string of losses sparked a rebirth inside of me. Now I've exploded with productivity and getting a lot of networking going. Even my wife reminded me it's often a 3-5 year upward climb when we're in this game starving for a bone. I had 16 years as an A-list music and film journalist and lost it all with the mags folding from the internet. It's been a slow rebuild trying to gain traction, but it's slowly coming. Find new things to work on when you finish a project and let that be your norm. That way you've built a long string of submissions you're not obsessing to hear back from and you're staying in fluid motion. Stay strong, Graham.
"Strong" is my middle name.
Er, last name... lol
Thanks Ray. I didn't know that was your past writing life! What an interesting career that must have been. I mean, I know rock and movie stars are "just people like everyone else", but the stories they would have!
Yeah, the "finding new projects" resonates. That's often how I dig out of any creative funk. Thankfully, it worked this time, too!